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You’ve been working hard for a long time. Pretty much as long as you can remember. Now all that hard work is paying off, right? You have a job you absolutely love, you’re making loads of money, you have ample time to enjoy your friends and family and you can’t remember a time when you were happier and more content. If this last sentence rings true for you, congratulations! While this blog post was not really written with you in mind, you’re welcome to read on.
For those of you (doctors, residents and medical students) who aren’t experiencing your desired level of success or sense of flow in your lives right now, I wrote this post with you in mind.
You’ve overcome many hurdles to get where you are, and you have much to be proud of. Yet how often do you stop and allow yourself to feel this sense of pride? Probably not as often as you allow yourself to feel stressed or anxious about what your days consist of, and what your future will bring. Please take a few moments, right now, to appreciate and recognize yourself for all that you’ve accomplished and endured to get where you are now. Give yourself a hug, or a pat on the shoulder, or place your hands over your heart, and accept my sincere gratitude and appreciation. You are doing truly important work and you are making a difference in many people’s lives. Thank you.
You’ve already proven that you have what it takes to succeed. You’ve shown that you can establish a difficult goal and do what’s necessary to achieve that goal. You can hold your own against the competition; you can survive lack of sleep, intense pressure and a grueling schedule. You are an accomplished physician (or resident or student,) yet you probably find yourself in limbo between trying to excel, trying to survive, and trying to somehow maintain a sense of balance in your life and your relationships.
Because there have been so many changes in the healthcare landscape recently, many doctors (including residents and medical students) find it difficult to feel hopeful, or to create a clear vision of their future. Healthcare reform is just starting to have an impact, and the implications for our practices are unclear. For many doctors, this is creating a sense of foreboding, uneasiness, or downright fear. Many doctors (perhaps even most) see themselves as “victims of change,” or “victims of circumstances.”
I’d like to offer you a better way to plan for your future. Rather than worry about what “might” be, why not focus on the aspects of your future that you DO have control over. Since there’s no way to truly know what the future has in store, instead of worrying so much about things that may or may not ever come to be, wouldn’t it serve you better to develop strategies that allow you to adjust to any changes more powerfully and successfully? Wouldn’t it help to learn how to become truly adaptable, and to actually look forward to change, recognizing that change is one of the only constants in life? After all, isn’t change what allows you to grow and keeps things interesting?
If you are not a Master of Change, by default you are a Victim of Change!
Wouldn’t you rather be a Master of Change?
How do you do this? What are the steps to becoming a Master of Change?
I’ve devoted the past several years of my life to studying and teaching this very thing, and I’m very passionate about sharing what I’ve learned with others, especially doctors, who typically view change the same way they view root canal surgery or taxes.
Like most things that are truly valuable, becoming a Master of Change doesn’t happen overnight. However, once you feel that desire and make the commitment, it’s well within your grasp. You’ve tackled far more difficult challenges in your life.
The first step to becoming a Master of Change is developing a very clear understanding of who you are at your core- The Real You.
You may think you know who you are right now, but more than likely you’re relying on data that is incomplete at best, and very possibly, totally inaccurate. Most people believe that they are the sum total of the experiences they’ve had and what society has defined them as. Most people are wrong, which is why most people lead “lives of quiet desperation.” You don’t need to be like most people.
Knowing who you are at your core-the Real You- requires you to be very honest with yourself. Sometimes you need to get feedback from other people who know you well and you trust to tell you the truth. Parts of the process can be uncomfortable, but if you’re committed to it, what comes out of the process is nothing short of miraculous. Knowing who you are at your core provides you with an internal navigation system (an internal GPS) that will assist you in making the right decisions– every time– for the rest of your life. And like a good navigation system, it will guide you back whenever you veer off of your true path (which is bound to happen.)
This isn’t something that requires deep spiritual practice or hundreds of hours of silent meditation, though I certainly wouldn’t discourage this type of practice if you want to go there. Discovering who you are at your core is something you can do in the comfort of your home, in just a few hours. There are loads of exercises and programs available out there to help you achieve this understanding, and I would be thrilled to assist you through one of our upcoming Doctors On Purpose workshops or virtual group programs, so please stay tuned for more information on how to participate in one of these. If you want to learn about doing this in a more intimate, one-on-one format, which is the fastest and most powerful way to get there, please email me at DrBob@DoctorsOnPurpose.com and we can discuss how we can work together.
I’m going to share more details about the process of knowing who you are and becoming a Master of Change in my next blog post, but for now, please give some thought to these all-important questions:
These are the key inquiries you must explore to truly know who you are, which is the first step to becoming a Master of Change.
I wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving and a peaceful and friendship-filled holiday season!
Dr. Bob
When you decide to do something and are truly committed to it, the universe comes to your aid. There are forces at work that most of us don’t truly understand, but should be aware of, so we can acknowledge them and be empowered by them.
My newest private coaching client, who signed up a few days ago, is a perfect example of this.
To preserve her anonymity, I’ll call my client “Judy.” Judy is an osteopathic physician in the Midwest who has been less fulfilled than she would like to be with her private practice over the past couple of years. A friend told her about me after reading a recent blog post, so Judy applied for a Free Consultation, which we had a few days ago.
I really enjoyed our Consultation. More than most, Judy is still passionate about being a doctor, and has several ideas about what she could do to improve her practice and her life, but she feels stuck when it comes to making the RIGHT decision—the decision that’s going to allow her to live the most authentic and inspired life, while having the significant impact on her patients and the world that she wants to have. She also wants to be sure she continues to prioritize her health, her family and having time to enjoy herself.
Judy is already running a program as part of her practice that helps patients lose weight and create a more healthy and wholesome lifestyle. She loves doing this work, but was unclear about how to grow that part of her practice and reduce the amount of time doing work she doesn’t enjoy as much, especially some of the administrative duties that go along with running a solo family practice.
After we spent about 40 minutes discussing her life and her practice, her dreams and her frustrations, I was convinced that I could help her– mostly because she is so READY to receive help. We discussed the details of my private coaching practice and my fees. She hemmed and hawed for a bit, and then told me she would need a few days to sleep on it and see if she could put into practice some of the ideas we discussed on the call. I knew that if she got off the phone at that point, she’d convince herself it was too expensive and that she could figure out what to do on her own. And nothing would change for her. It’s a pattern that all coaches have seen too many times before (in fact, it used to be MY pattern.)
So, before we hung up, I asked her to consider and answer two questions for me. First, how many new customers would she need to bring into her weight loss program to make back the investment in private coaching? The answer was “five.” Five new participants, that’s all. Next I asked her to imagine what it would feel like for her to look back in five years and realize that nothing had changed substantially in her life. How would it feel to know that she could have made a relatively small (though in the moment it doesn’t seem to small) investment in herself right now to propel herself onto a new path, and didn’t? When we hung up, I knew that she was going to give both of those ideas a lot more thought, and was fairly confident that we’d be working together.
I was right. Judy texted me back a few hours later with the words “I’M IN!!” I was so happy—for her as well as for me, because I really wanted to see her accomplish her goals, and was confident I could help.
We’ve spoken a couple of times since then to discuss the details of the coaching relationship and schedule our calls together. Each time we speak there is a new and higher level of enthusiasm and power in her voice.
Judy just sent me an email that read “I already feel a significant shift in who I am and what I know I can do with my life from this point. I can’t believe how much freer I feel already! What a joy it was to say “GREAT!” when my honey called to ask how my day was! I feel much more positive, relaxed, open to insight and committed to making things work. ”
And we haven’t even done a moment of actual coaching yet! We’ve just had an initial conversation about what’s possible through coaching and scheduled our first session!
This is the power of someone investing in themselves. When you make a commitment, your world changes. You’re not the same person you were before that decision was made. It does require getting a little (or a lot) uncomfortable first, and then moving past that discomfort to a new way of thinking and feeling.
I’ve invested in myself heavily over the past few years through various workshops, coaches and mentors. Each time it’s a little uncomfortable, and each time it ‘s taken my life to new heights.
Judy is going to find new heights of purpose, passion and direction for her life over the next few months. These are gifts that will have a positive impact on her life forever. For that, I’m thrilled.
Even more exciting to me is that Judy is going to pass along all the gifts she receives from opening herself up to new way of thinking and feeling, and bring new levels of passion and purpose to the many people whose lives she touches throughout the remainder of her days.
What can you commit to doing today so that the Universe can come to your assistance ?
A Tribute to One of My Role Models Jun 11, 2012
Are You Ready to Die? May 10, 2012
Tribal Leadership- A Book You Need to Read!! Jan 18, 2012
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